


demons'll charm you with a smile for a while, but in time, nothing can harm you (not while i'm around)

by butmomilovepeter



Series: come wrestle me free; clean from the war [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, HOW do you put italics in the summary lmao, Implied/Referenced Torture, Jack Kline Angst, Jack Kline Needs A Hug, Nightmares, Sam Winchester Has PTSD - Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Sam Winchester Needs a Hug, canon divergence but only like a little bit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-29
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-10-18 14:22:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 873
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17582525
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butmomilovepeter/pseuds/butmomilovepeter
Summary: He’s ready to hide back in his room with some lame excuse of wanting to read a book (when really he will probably stare at his ceiling as feel his skin be ripped off again and feel the cold trap his lungs again and see his family die again and it’s all your fault Sam) when Jack stumbles sleepily out from his bedroom, all messy-haired and rosy cheeked.





	demons'll charm you with a smile for a while, but in time, nothing can harm you (not while i'm around)

**Author's Note:**

> i guess this would be somewhere between micheal taking over dean and jack being healed?? idk im having a good time

Sam hasn’t slept in three days.

This isn’t the first time it’s happened, and he knows it won’t be the last.

He’s too cold. He turns the water up higher.

_(Sorry if it's a bit chilly. Most people think I burn hot. It's actually quite the opposite.)_

He shakes the voice out of his head because _he’s gone he’s gone he can’t hurt you anymore because he’s gone._

But no matter how many time he splashes the hot water on his face and let’s it fall down all around him, he can’t shake the cold.

When he steps out of the shower, he tries not to shudder as he puts his clothes on.

He tries to ignore the way his stomach rumbles. He needs to eat. He _wants_ to eat. But the weight of a million sins he’s acted upon and the millions of people who died because of him settle in his stomach like a rock that chucks out all the food he attempts to keep down.

He’s ready to hide back in his room with some lame excuse of wanting to read a book (when really he will probably stare at his ceiling as feel his skin be ripped off _again_ and feel the cold trap his lungs _again_ and see his family die _again and it’s all your fault Sam)_ when Jack stumbles sleepily out from his bedroom, all messy-haired and rosy cheeked.

“Good morning Sam!” He says with a child-like chipper-ness that Sam often forgets exists. And for some reason, the muscles in his face start curling into a soft smile.

“Morning, Jack.” Sam responds, pushing down the rock in his stomach. “Did you sleep okay?”

Something in Jack’s demeanor cracks, only for a second, but Sam can almost see the nightmares being remembered in the kid’s mind. But he snaps back quicker than it had happened.

“Still getting used to it, I guess.” Jack says, pretending to brush it off as just the _newly human_ part, and not the _my father tried to kill me_ and _I was deathly ill and almost died_ part.

Sam puts an arm around him playfully, leading him into the kitchen. “That’s all?”

In his defense, Jack tries to act as if he doesn’t understand the question. He shoots him a fake puzzled look before nodding, so Sam lets it go. He’ll definitely talk to him later, but he doesn’t want to ruin the good morning.

The smell of bacon fills the air, and the scene of Dean cooking some carb-loaded breakfast with Cas reading some article in a paper that nobody else would want to read.

“Morning, Princess. Morning, Princess Jr. How are we this fine Saturday morning?” Dean greets, flipping the hot bacon over on the plate, only to pull back sharply at its heat.

“You’re in a good mood. Since when are you up before me?” Sam asks, pouring himself an unhealthy amount of coffee. He ignores Cas’s side eye, wondering if the older men can see his lack of sleep.

He decides yes, because then Dean says, “Since you obviously haven’t slept in god knows how long.”

Sam gulps and looks away, because he can _see_ Jack’s realization of his state form on his face. He chugs his coffee down, wishing someone would change the subject.

Thankfully, his savoir is Cas, like always.

“It had always confused me why humans like bacon so much. Yet, now I completely understand.”

He smiles and watches as the attention shifts.

He’s still cold.

 

~

“S-Sam?” Jack’s voice breaks a little from behind the door.

Sam sits up in bed, quickly flipping the covers over and half running to the door. He opens it quickly, to see Jack standing shakily with tears running down his cheeks.

“Jack? What’s wrong, buddy?” Sam takes him by the shoulders, pulling him into his room without hesitation. Jack closes the door himself, before launching himself into Sam’s arms.

Sam doesn’t even let a second pass before returning it, letting the kid shake and sob all while he held on tight.

“You’re alright, It was dream, kiddo,” Sam smooths down Jack’s hair, the other rubbing slow circles on his back. “No one's gonna hurt you, bud.”

Jack doesn’t quite respond, but the grip on Sam’s t-shirt loosens in the back.

“I didn’t mean to wake you.” Jack says miserably, pulling his face away from Sam’s chest. Sam flushes, but hopes Jack doesn’t see it in the dim lighted room.

“You didn’t. Wasn’t asleep.” Sam responds curtly, trying to avoid it.

Jack wipes his face with his sleeve, titling his head. “You weren’t? Is that what Dean keeps talking to Cas about?”

The youthfulness that fills Jack’s voice makes Sam’s heart ache.

“Probably,” he sighs. “Don’t worry about me.”

Jack nods reluctantly, returning himself to Sam’s arms.

“Every time I close my eyes...I-I…” Jack tries, but ends up sniffling and stopping.

“I know, kid. I understand.”

“You do?”

Sam nods. “Yeah, buddy, I do.”

And Jack doesn’t ask anymore questions. He just lets himself be held and Sam is grateful.

 _One day,_ Sam thinks. _I will be okay. Jack will be okay. It will all be okay._

He wishes so desperately, he thinks there a chance it’ll come true.

 


End file.
